The time has come to renew my blog. 25 July 2024. No idea when I started it, but lets resume!

So, most recently I had my long near death experience, wch apparently began in Spruce Pine, sometime back in 23 during an extremely overlong visit there. At one point in its depth, I dreamed that an evil devouring giant had pulled himself out of my bedroom wall and was preparing to devour me. This was a bad dream, I guess, but it was far too real. And after that, nothing good happened to me for the next months, until finally I was allowed to leave, by plane, on a hellish trip with WestJet, whom I implacably hate. I would rather die than take another WestJet plane--the flight staff acted like Nazis, disagreeable by impulse. Impolite, arrogant and treated foreign passengers with astonishing disrespect. Utterly disgusting.

After I had been back home for about ten days, I suddenly fell apart--lost most memory, intellectual faculties, reflexive skills, like violin fingering. There was nothing left of myself. It took six months to recover, with mild cognitive impairment still hindering my activities, reading, writing. 

Cardiac problems, need for a stent, which I thought I was too weak to have installed, and feared it could cause more damage and discomfort once in place than if I simply went without, which I decided to do. This could have been a mistake, we will never know. But the cons seemed to me a bit too overwhelming, and I was not at all sure of our handling my recovery successfully, assuming I did survive and recover.

I am thinking now about how to continue my life, possibly with career, in retirement. 30 June 2024.

With emeritus status I can keep a parking spot, fairly good library privileges, IT support, possible office space if desirable. And maybe some health insurance, tho not very good, they say. It will be better for my self esteem if I can at least seem to maintain some kind of campus usefulness, which I will indeed try to do as time passes and I settle in to retirement.

I think a lot of normal and relatively happy people eventually slip completely away from the campus environment, but I think the research and writing I did have been to close to what I am for me to relinquish all that came with it. I still think, and I can probably write. Whether I can regain and keep precision with words and thoughts is still quite a question.